round
“the orchid-dandelion hypothesis: the notion that genes and traits that underlie some of humans’ biggest weaknesses — despair, madness, savage aggression — also underlie some of our greatest strengths — resilience, lasting happiness, empathy. If you’re used to the disease model of genes that are associated with mood and behavioral problems, this hypothesis can seem puzzling. The turn lies in viewing problems such as depression, distractibility, or even aggression as downsides of a heightened sensitivity to experience that can also generate assets and contentment.”
—Is Sensitivity a Curse or a Blessing? My Latest on The Orchid-Dandelion Hypothesis | Wired Science | Wired.com
February 2012
14 posts
“
Playing together helps us to explore and learn about sharing power.
Even among complete strangers, a moment of playfulness, even outright silliness, forms and instant resonance.
” —Blog
“Learning in action.”
—A Learning a Day: On Queen Died. King Died
“The stories we tell about ourselves are probably most important because they are what bring meaning to our journeys”
—A Learning a Day
“I am the owner of my karma. I inherit my karma. I am born of my karma. I am related to my karma. I live supported by my karma. Whatever karma I create, whether good or evil, that I shall inherit.”
—Karma in Buddhism - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
“Perhaps it is time to create a new paradigm of expressing loving relationships — one that has the capacity to honor the human need for connection as well as our need for freedom, and that manages to embody the intimate and infinite at the same time.”
—Akoshia Yoba: Lying Aside, I’m a Good Catch: When Marriage Becomes A Ponzi Scheme
“
Here’s the “411” on how to tell if you’re really a good catch (your momma’s opinion aside):
1. Are You a “Real Grown-Up? This means void of mental games, and minus the bragging about your “conquests”. It also means letting go of excess baggage from former lovers. Recognize that sometimes love hurts. Get over it and move on.
2. Do You Have Realistic Expectations? I am often amazed at how guys think that relationships will flourish and “magically” be sustained with very little effort on their part. Anything worth having has to be worked at! You can’t put in 60 hours a week at work, and 60 minutes a week with your woman and expect to have success at both. Also, if you want your girl to look like Mariah Carey, you probably shouldn’t look like Drew Carey!
3. Are You an Equal Partner? Can you give as well as take? Are you willing to compromise to make your mate happy? As a popular record states “I can do bad by myself.”
4. Forget A Good Job. Do You Have a Good Heart? In today’s economy, job security is fleeting. But a good heart will endear you indefinitely to your love interest. Are you kind and generous? Loyal? Are you responsible? This is what has true staying power to a woman of substance.
5. Can You Be Trusted? Around your girlfriend’s girlfriends? When out with the fellas? When by yourself? Or do you have to be watched like a hawk so you don’t cheat?
6. Are You Health Conscious? Decent to look at? Void of unhealthy habits like alcohol or substance abuse? But not a fitness nut either.
7. Do You Respect a Woman’s Opinion and Her Intellect? Or do you view females as second-class citizens who should be seen and not heard? Do you take an interest in things that are important to her?
8. Are You Still on Amicable Terms with Most of Your Exes?
” —Are You A Good Catch?- Good catches tend to have really positive outlooks on life. Watch how he acts when he gets hurt. It’s okay to be upset for a while, but as long as he cuts his losses and moves on then you know his outlook is bright.
- On the other hand, if the guy seems hard to please, if he acts like a know-it-all, and if he holds a grudge, he’s probably a bad catch.
- Look at the way your catch treats people who can’t defend themselves. How does he treat the checkout operator at the supermarket, the kid who washes his car for a fundraiser, the McDonalds cashier who serves you on your first night out…? (Girl, if he’s taking you to Maccers for a first date, you’ve got bigger issues…)
- Does give them the evils if they get his order wrong, mock them for being slow, etc? This is a pretty good indicator of how he will treat you down the line if you ever irritate or inconvenience him.
- You are the Ruler!
- Goal: Order, prosperity
- Fear: Chaos
- Response to Dragon/Problem: Find its constructive uses
- Task: Take full responsibility for life
- Gift: Responsibility, control
- Addictions: Control, codependence
- Rulers are realists who do not have the leisure to have illusions; they are integrated, whole and ready to take responsibility for loves. Rulers understand that his/her own capacity for harm is as great as their capacity for good, and take responsibility for his/her actions. The Ruler maintains life and governs it. The emergence of the positive Ruler archetype indicates some achievement of mastery in the world. At best, Rulers are ecological and find the best methods to deal with everything.
“
You are the Creator!
Goal: Identity
Fear: Inauthenticity
Response to Dragon/Problem: Claim it as part of the self
Task: self-creation, self-acceptance
Gift: Individuality, vocation
Addictions: Work, creativity
The Creator is the center of improvement, always striving to create and better her/his surroundings. The Soul is the center of the Creator’s dance, and it seeks to find a deeper sense of self and wisdom even at the price of the Ego’s functions of keeping us healthy and functioning. The Soul is the source of our freewill, and the healthy creator can tap into the potential, creating circumstances while others feel acted upon by her/his actions. The Creator is driven to be authentic despite the costs. Creators are threatening to Warriors and Seekers, who are very concerned with how things are ‘supposed’ to be.
” —OkCupid | Take Awakening the Hero Within: Hero Archetype Test
“You are the Magician! Goal: Transformation Fear: Evil sorcery Response to Dragon/Problem: Transform it Task: Align self with cosmos Gift: Personal power Addictions: Power, hallucinogenic or mind-altering drugs Magicians are intuitive to the point that they know things that they did not know they could know. The Magician sees the sacred as something immanent in us, nature, society, the earth, and the cosmos. Thus the Magician provides as sense of connectedness wit the whole and an understanding that what within us contains all that is outside ourselves. Magicians can align the body, mind and soul around a commitment to really let go of a pattern. In healing the self, the Magician learns how to heal others.”
—
OkCupid | Take Awakening the Hero Within: Hero Archetype Test
“Goal: Bliss Fear: Loss of love Response to Dragon/Problem: Love it Task: Follow bliss Gift: Passion, commitment Addictions: Relationships, sex The Lover’s path is the path of the Soul, the path of Eros instead of Ego. The Lover is often unfairly criticized for his/her lack of prudence when making decisions by following the often illogical, more difficult path of following one’s passion. Most of the other Archetypes, especially the Orphan and the Sage, will be very critical of the Lovers ability to surrender their control for their passions. A well-developed Lover, however, also has a strong identity and a deep foundation that is not easily recognized by the types that are controlled by Ego.”
—
OkCupid | Take Awakening the Hero Within: Hero Archetype Test
- love·ly
- [luhv-lee] Show IPA adjective, -li·er, -li·est, noun, plural -lies, adverb
- adjective
- 1.
- charmingly or exquisitely beautiful: a lovely flower.
- 2.
- having a beauty that appeals to the heart or mind as well as to the eye, as a person or a face.
- 3.
- delightful; highly pleasing: to have a lovely time.
- 4.
- of a great moral or spiritual beauty: a lovely character.
